Language
Talking about the words we use to describe our experience can be a useful way to start a conversation. Firstly, we can make sure we are all using the same words in the same way. This helps us understand each other, but can also bring out some interesting conversation when we discover that words have different associations and meanings to us. Thinking about the nuances and differences between one term and another can help us flesh out abstract concepts.
Loss is the occasion of losing something or someone important to us and experiencing its’ absence.
Grief is the emotion we experience as a result of a loss.
Mourning is what we do in response. It is the actions we undertake to process the grief and loss.
Ecological grief is a term used to describe the experience of grief concerning our environment including the loss of plants, animals and landscapes.
Conversation starters:
What is the difference between loss, grief, sorrow, sadness and mourning? What do the words mean to you?
Are there other words or phrases that better suit your feelings of loss or grief concerning the environment and climate change?
Does ‘ecological grief’ really need a name of its own? Is it different to other forms of grief?
Loss and grief related to our environment and ecosystems have elements in common with other forms of loss like bereavement or relationship breakdown. However, psychologists have identified some common features of ecological grief that aren’t necessarily a feature of bereavement:
Ecological grief can be ambiguous
The loss may be certain, but not have happened yet. Or, it may be extremely likely but not certain. For example, a species may not be extinct yet. However, the action needed to save it is so unlikely to happen we are certain it is doomed.
This creates an ambiguity around the loss and the grieving process.
Ecological grief can be intangible
Tangible losses are those where there is a physical absence of a person or object. Intangible losses are those that other people can’t see. Intangible losses could include feelings of companionship, routines, or aspects of our identity.
Disenfranchised grief
Grief is disenfranchised when it is recognised or allowed to be expressed. There is a socially constructed silence around climate change that may make it hard to get support from the people around us. Different people may experience different things as losses.
Conversation starter:
Is ecological grief different to other forms of grief you’ve experienced?
Do you relate to the idea of ambiguous loss? Or intangible loss? Or disenfranchised grief?
What are you experiencing as a loss? What are you grieving for?
Are grief, sadness and sorrow ‘useful emotions’?
In an earlier conversation, a couple of participants said sadness makes it harder to want to engage in conversations about climate change than other emotions like anger.
Dr Panu Pihkala and Thomas Doherty offer some answers in an episode of their podcast.
Reason 1. Grief and sadness help us come to terms with our loss.
There are changes happening in the world and if we feel some kind of loss in relation to those changes, then sadness is the emotion which helps us to react to those changes and losses. So I think it is very important to highlight the adaptive and positive character, so to speck, of sadness
Dr Panu Pihkala, Climate Change and Happiness podcast, Season 3 Episode 11
Reason 2. There can be growth in coming to terms with a loss.
It may not always feel good, but you know, after it has flowed, the energy of sadness (often depicted by water metaphors), then pone usually feels better after that. Of course, depending on the loss, this may take sometimes years before the flow is complete again. And sometimes something may truly be lost and the world has changed. But still, there can be also progress in dealing with losses and related emotions.
Dr Panu Pihkala, Climate Change and Happiness podcast, Season 3 Episode 11
The ‘usefulness’ of sadness and sorrow might not be related to inspiring us to action. It might be that it is important because it helps us to come to terms with our loss, and find meaning and growth in the experience.
That isn’t to ‘bright-side’ or ‘silver-line’ (insist people look for the positive in their experience and downplay their suffering) the experience of grief. It can be very painful.
And, grief and sorrow are useful to action in a subtle way. The authors of Living with the Climate Crisis say:
Not everyone feels this extreme and traumatic grief but grief is there in some form for most people who grapple with the climate crisis. It needs to be talked about, supported, understood and lived through if people are to take a useful place in the climate movement.
Rosemary Randall and others Living with the Climate Crisis Facilitators Guide
The tasks of Grief
The process of grieving can be thought of as a series of tasks that can be faced or turned away from. The tasks aren’t necessarily met in order and may be revisited again and again. As Rosemary Randall and her colleagues emphasise, grief is a complicated and messy process.
Engaging with the four tasks:
- Accepting the reality of the loss, intellectually and emotionally.
- Working through the painful emotions.
- Adjusting to the new environment, acquiring new skills, and developing a new sense of self.
- Reinvesting emotional energy. Finding a path to action.
Turning away from the tasks might look like this:
- Denial.
- Shutting off emotions.
- Not adapting. Becoming bitter, helpless, angry or depressed.
- Refusing to love. Turning away from life.
Rosemary Randall and Others Living with the Climate Crisis Facilitators Guide
More conversation starters
- What are your experiences of ecological grief, loss and sorrow?
- Does it matter if we grieve and mourn or not?
- Are sadness, sorrow and grief ‘useful’ emotions?
- What makes it difficult to talk about grief and loss concerning climate change?
- How can we make conversations about grief and loss concerning climate change more acceptable?